Introduction
Sometimes, us wammers & sploshers have no choice but to have a sploshing session in a hotel room. The thought may make you anxious, but with the guidance and advice in this blog post you can be sure of your privacy, make sure you have everything you need, clean up with ease, relax and have a great time.
So read on, prepare well and then you can just focus on the main point. Fun!
What You Should Pack
This depends on how much mess you’ll be using and which type of mess, but I’ll list what I took with me on all my wam session tours and you can evaluate from there what you will need.
Here’s my comprehensive kit list:
Wheeled suitcase - huge. To contain everything and be easy to manoeuvre. Pro tip - pack heavy items at the bottom.
Wam substances and messy stuff for your session - I take 5kg gunge powder, many cartons of custard, tins of stuff, shaving cream, poster paint, etc. This depends heavily on your preferences, of course.
Extra towels - always, always handy. Bonus points if dark (avoids staining if you use them for cleaning or miss a spot when showering)
Very strong bin black bags - make sure they are not white or see through. You don’t want anyone having a clear view of your trash. Take more than you think you’ll need.
Can opener - make sure it’s one you’ve used before and that you know works.
Scissors - excellent for certain packaging, cartons, clothes tags, etc
Utensils - I take a whisk, big spoons and a spatula for gunge mixing and pie prep
Buckets - Pack these in the bottom of your suitcase and then fill with the heaviest items for space saving and the best spread of the weight. If you are planning on a huge session, take as many spare buckets as you can as they are very useful during the clean up and the session itself.
Bowls & Jugs - I enjoy decanting the contents of tins, cans and sometimes cartons into these. It’s much safer, especially where sharp tins are concerned.
First Aid Kit - best to be prepared
Plastic sheeting - or drop cloths, whatever you call them, always great to have. Bonus points if you can find heavier grade ones that don’t float around and stick to you at the slightest breeze.
Low tack masking tape - this won’t pull paint off the wall when hanging plastic sheeting
Duct tape - always handy to have and your plastic sheeting seems like it might fall down, cut off a tiny square of duct tape and that should keep it in place without damaging the wall or paint.
Dustpan- great for scraping and scooping out the mess. Be careful to get one that has rounded edges though (so you don’t put holes in your plastic or pool)
Cleaning cloths - microfibre are best.
Cleaning spray - get one that smells nice. I recommend the Method brand pink grapefruit scented one.
Air freshener spray - to get rid of any telltale odours
Scrubbing brush - I like to take a hard bristled, and a soft bristled one, and a ‘scrub daddy’ (a scourer that can be hard or soft depending on whether you use cold or hot water with it)
Squeegee - great for pool cleaning.
Washing up liquid/dish soap - for cleaning buckets, bowls, jugs and utensils.
Kitchen roll/paper - for drying surfaces, pool, containers, buckets, etc.
Rubber gloves and hand sanitising gel - in case you end up needing to unblock the loo when disposing of buckets full of stuff.
Plastic loofah/bath puff - the best thing for getting mess off your skin, especially gunge/slime.
Shower gel - make sure it contains real lemon if you are using dairy items. See my article about dairy sploshing here.
Shampoo - don’t rely on the hotel supplying enough!
Conditioner - you might need lots of this if you’re planning on using cake batter or other floury items. See my article about it here.
Comb - for combing any bits and blobs out of your hair. Take a selection of sizes if you’ll be using flour or cake batter (again, see my article here for why)
Hairdryer - the ones in the room are usually rubbish.
A lightweight outfit to wear while cleaning up. - Think comfy, stretchy summer clothing so you don’t get too hot and don’t ruin anything you’re not intending to.
Outfit for your session - unless you’re a naked wammer, of course.
Spare clothes - pack spares of everything!
Make up, hair care and any other accessories like wigs, shoes, bondage equipment etc you intend on using/wearing for your session.
Candle - hear me out here! A candle that has been previously lit, and put out again. This is so you can blame it if the fire alarm goes off. A brand new one that obviously hasn’t been used would be no good and obviously you can’t actually light it in the room, because of the fire alarm! This is very optional obviously, but if the question ‘what do I do if I set the fire alarm off’ ever entered your head, being able to blame a candle and show them through the mostly closed door (with the chain on) is far preferable to having to let them check your room!
Inflatable pool - for containing mess. Can be a small one, or a nuru massage mat if you are not using crazy amounts of mess. You can also use a nice heavy grade plastic and prop the edges up with rolled towels or pool noodles underneath to stop anything runny leaking out.
Blanket - take a large, soft fleece blanket or foam floor mats to cushion under your pool and protect your knees during wam play.
Electric air pump - for the pool. Test it first and find the right nozzle that fits to save time on the day.
Extension cord - handy for getting your electric air pump or hairdryer (or phone chargers etc) where you need it.
Camera - remember your camera or camcorder if you intend to record your session.
Chargers and batteries - for your camera, camcorder, phone, laptop, etc.
Water and snacks - preparing and cleaning up can be hard work, make sure you take care of yourself and have food available in case you find yourself parched and starving in the middle of the night with only a vending machine and all shops, restaurants closed
Hair ties - if you have long hair, it's good to keep it out the way while preparing or cleaning
Avoiding Suspicion
You don’t have to work as hard as you think to avoid suspicion. Walking through the lobby can be nerve-wracking, but remember, no one really cares what you are doing. Anyone present just wants to either do their job or go to their own room. They have their own lives and concerns, and I promise none of them involve you.
Bring all your wam supplies for preparation, the sessions itself and clean up in regular luggage items. I use a huge wheeled suitcase. Most people staying in the hotel will do the same with all their stuff - all of them have luggage and you don’t know what they have packed. The same goes for you. No one knows!
Even if you are there for only one night, there could be many reasons you have a giant suitcase with you, like business travel, or a stop off on the way/way back from a longer trip.
Some hotels (I noticed this one in a certain Travelodge in Surrey and one of the Jury’s Inn hotels in Edinburgh) have completely separate areas for checking in and accessing rooms. If your hotel is like this, it can help ease the paranoia, but also always remember, no one cares.
Before Unpacking Or Preparing Anything
Scope out the bin situation - sometimes there are big commercial bins easily accessible outside - this will be handy if you want to throw rubbish and leftover away instead of taking them home for you or leaving them for the cleaner (make sure everything is triple bagged, not too heavy and leave them a tip if you do this - more advice on this later)
Open a window or make sure the air con is working - this is important to avoid humidity setting off the fire alarm. Switch and keep the light on in the bathroom too to keep the extractor fan going.
Check that the shower works. (and the taps) You don’t want to be covered in stuff and then discover the shower is broken.
Cancel housekeeping/cleaner. Some hotels are ‘opt in’ for this, so if so, just don’t opt in.
Put the ‘do not disturb’ sign on the door. On one wam session tour, I unpacked and then went out for dinner. When I returned, a staff member had entered my room to leave a gift of chocolate and a note of thanks. Remember, I said I’d unpacked? Yeah, they saw all my buckets, thigh boots and bondage gear! I put the do not disturb sign up straight away. Over the next few days, they left gifts outside my door instead of entering.
Lock the door and affix the security chain. Sometimes the door doesn’t fully lock automatically. The chain can then prevent anyone fully entering even if they have a key (like if you forgot the do not disturb sign)
Put the TV or some music on at a decent level but not too loud, to help cover up and weird preparation and session noises
During Preparation
Check you have everything you need and know where local shops are if you forgot anything or need snacks, extra wam supplies, shower gel, etc
Set up the room. I prefer to use the main room rather than the bathroom (I’ll explain why shortly) . I upend the bed onto its side, cover the floor and walls in plastic, inflate my pool, and set up the ironing board and bedside tables to put pies and jugs and cartons on. In some hotel rooms, you have enough space and don’t need to move the bed, but just remember that is an option if you need to.
Put items where they will be needed. Toiletries in the bathroom, wam supplies near your pool/plastic and protect the floor near your pool so you can put empty or full buckets or any leftovers out of the way when needed.
Open a few bin bags in advance - even better if you can line a spare bucket or two with one to use as a rubbish bin during and after the session, but just having them opened and nearby can be enough.
Open cartons and tins and prepare pies, and mix gunge in advance. For humidity reasons, get your session going within 2 hours or so of doing this.
If you're using gunge, perfect your mixing technique well in advance of the session - know which size buckets to use and how much water, and how to get it smoothly to the thickness you prefer. Nothing worse than ending up with lumpy water, especially in a hotel.
Put anything you want to keep clean and dry in the wardrobe or drawers.
Line your route to the bathroom with plastic or spare towels.
If you have been mixing gunge, sometimes the powder can leave a fine dust in the air which eventually settles and can become slippery once it mixes with humidity, so just look out for that and wipe up any dust
Get your decoy candle (one that has been previously lit and put out as mentioned in the kit list) in position!
When all the preparation is done, get yourself ready. Don’t do your hair, make-up and outfit first as preparation can be sweaty work, so get that out the way first.
Why I Don’t Splosh In The Hotel Bathroom
The ability to get yourself clean easily is the main reason I don’t use the bathroom in hotels for wam sessions. It’s so nice to shower without having to clean or unclog a bath, or clean the floor first.
If you are well prepared and accidentally make a mess, say, on the carpet in the main room, you’ll be able to clean it up and leave no trace, because you’ve got your cleaning spray and microfibre cloths. No need to block your bathroom access.
Plus, it keeps the toilet available too in case you or anyone needs it during the session and it means you can leave make-up, toiletries and cleaning supplies in there without them getting splattered.
After Your Messy Session
If you have used a lot of mess in a pool, scoop as much as you can into buckets first before you shower. Ideally all of it, then you won’t risk needing to get back in to scoop out more.
If your substances are thick and lumpy, then leave the buckets half full so you can water the content down later for easier flushing (this is where spare buckets in the kit list are handy)
Put a towel or plastic on the floor next to your pool to put the buckets on (the bottoms of the buckets get messy, so this is to save the carpet)
If you messed up an outfit during the session, it’s much easier to just throw it away, but if you feel the need to save it, put it in a bucket and take it with you when you shower, getting the worst of the mess cleaned off while you shower, then wring it all out well, triple bag it and put it in your luggage. Or just set it aside after your session, and give it a little hand wash later with some dish soap, before the wringing out and bagging to take home.
I recently wrote an even more in depth guide to pool cleaning with step by step instructions from prep to finish, and my thoughts on wet/dry vacuums and lining the pool with plastic. To read that, go here
Showering
Keep the bathroom door closed while the shower is running and for a while afterwards, this is again because of controlling humidity in the room to avoid fire alarm issues. If the bathroom has an extractor fan that runs when the light is on, keep the light on even when you’re not in there. For super specific tailored advice about cleaning certain types of mess off yourself, check my other articles and see if I’ve written about whatever it is you’ll be using yet.
Generally, you just want lots of a nice and strong smelling shower gel, plus plenty of shampoo and conditioner, and a comb to get any bits out of your hair. If you have used oily substances, rub shower gel and shampoo all over yourself first before getting wet - this helps emulsify and remove the oiliness.
Cleaning The Room
Put your cleaning up outfit on and deal with trash first - if there is a lot, then split it between several bin bags so you can make sure none of them are too heavy. Double bag them, secure them, and put them out of the way for now.
Now empty your buckets and clean your pool. Tip buckets of slop down the loo. If anything is very thick or lumpy, mix in some water to thin it down. Flush after each bucket. If it appears slow to flush or like it is blocking, don’t panic. Just fill a bucket with water from the tap and pour it on top of the blockage from a height. Use the loo brush or your rubber glove covered hand to help it along if need be. It will shift!
When the buckets are dealt with, clean one of them and put some hot, soapy water into it. This is to tip into your pool to clean it, but you might not need much, so take it a little at a time. If you managed to empty your pool completely after your session, just tip in a little of the water and scrub it around with a scrubbing brush.
Then use your squeegee and a dustpan, or a jug, to scoop the dirty water back out. When you’ve got rid of most of that water, you can keep the pool inflated and clean off the sides with the cleaning spray and a cloth. Then stand it up against a wall and give it a final polish and clean off. Dry it thoroughly and leave it to air dry overnight if you can.
Or, if you’re not bothered about saving the pool, you can skip fully cleaning it, cut it with the scissors, deflate it and wrap it in several bin bags, as with the other rubbish. Don’t skip emptying it first though or it will be too heavy and risk splitting the bag, even strong ones.
Now throw away all your plastic if you haven’t yet, and check the surfaces, floors, walls, ceiling and bathroom for any errant splodges. Use the cleaning spray and a cloth if you find any.
When you’ve finished cleaning, use your spare towels to wrap any wet cloths in, then bag them and put them in your luggage.
Disposing Of Leftover Mess And Rubbish
When you scoped the hotel bin situation out before preparing, If you noticed there was an obvious and easy place to get rid of rubbish like a big commercial bin outside then pack up your triple bagged rubbish into your wheelie suitcase, take it down to the bins and throw it away.
If not, you can triple bag all rubbish, make sure each bag is not too heavy, then leave a tip for the housekeeping/cleaning staff and leave the rubbish in the room. I have done this several times and never found myself banned from a hotel chain yet.
I asked at reception once about rubbish in my room, and they said to just leave it there. It is likely beyond the scope of the cleaners’ usual job though, so leave them a cash tip in the room before you leave
If you have little to throw away, again do the triple bagging and put it in your luggage, making sure it will not get squashed or leak, then dispose of it at home.
A Final Check
Put the room back together and all your rubbish out of the way. Make sure you take care of yourself, eat and rest, sleep for the night and then set an alarm for the morning, leaving enough time to do an ultimate check over before you leave.
If you used smelly wam substances, leave the window open if you can or use some air freshener.
With your eyes freshly rested, you might spot a few things you missed after the session. If so, deal with those.
Pack everything up, double check you triple bagged any rubbish and leave the tip for your cleaner.
Now you can check out and no one will be any the wiser!
You can always clean any substance off anything, and you can do it easily. You just need the right kit. With that in mind, I put together a whole page of all items I recommend and use myself in my studio and during personal WAM time. Join me in a more leisurely sploshing life!
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